Build Some Borders


I have a strong personality, and my man is easier going😎. He has no problem with my doing as I please( well, most of the time). He allows me to watch my favourite cartoons or soaps when he’s supposed to watch his games. He’s also agreeable to most of the social plans I make even though he often wonders why women seem to have so many social gatherings 😀. He doesn’t always complain about or resists things I want to do or need.

But as pleasant and laid-back as he is, he also has limits, and he refuses to let me or anyone else go so far. And I respect him for that. In many relationships, one of the two people whether friends, work associates, marriage partners, will have a stronger personality than the other. Some people naturally take the “lead roles” and others really thrive as followers. I am a leader, and I will lead no matter where I go or what I do.

I don’t take charge of situations on purpose, leading is just who I am and being a strong leader is part of my personality. But remember: it’s one thing to be a leader, its another thing altogether to be a controller or a manipulator. Most of us with strong leader type personalities have to find this out one way or the other. I have learned there’s a big difference between control and true godly leadership.

If you have a leader or a person with a strong personality or will in your life, I want you to know something that may surprise you: Most strong people do not respect those who allow them to be controlling. These people would really respect you for creating some limits you will not allow them to cross, just as I respect my man for not allowing my strong personality to control him.

Even though you may be a milder, more peace-loving, easier going personality, you must build some borders in your life. If you don’t, you will one day look back over your life and feel people used you, abuse you, walked all over you, and generally treated you without respect. You may end up bitter and resentful, and that will not be anyone’s fault but yours.

I want you to know that no one else will build the borders you need. You are responsible for standing up for yourself. If you are tired of feeling controlled, begin to set some limits. If you have allowed people to have their way all the time, they may find it difficult when you first establish borders, but you must persist and do so for their sake, as well as for your sake.

Love you all. Have a great day.

Photo images from pixabay

18 thoughts on “Build Some Borders

  1. This is was really good
    i agree that there is a difference between being a leader and just being controlling
    A good leader is someone who leads and make decisions based on other that supports him/her.
    Most times leading is natural
    Good job!

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    1. Thank you, very much for your kind words. I agree with you and also there are two things that shape the life of a leader: the people around him and his attitude towards them.
      It’s so thoughtful of you to drop by. Do visit again soon❤

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Nice again , utopian words when I heard no frontiers no borders no domes and sometimes I wanna be living in my own towers and it could be a problem… borders or frontiers yup and no un expat between human being or according to future time could be… affirmative 😈😈😈😈😇😇😇😇

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    1. I can relate to your words. Sometimes, it’s not easy living in your own towers because people are always fond of telling us how to live when they ain’t living right nor know who they really are.
      You are a wise man David.

      Liked by 1 person


  3. https://polldaddy.com/js/rating/rating.jsIn your second paragraph, did you mean , “he refuses to let me or anyone else go too far?”

    I’ve always liked, “Lead, follow or get to Hell out of the way.” I once posted it on my cubicle wall. The Superintendent ordered the Assistant Superintendent to have it removed. One year later, the former was gone, the Assistant got promoted and I was still in my cubicle.

    On a more positive note, I really enjoy your thoughts and observations and thanks a lot for reading The Daedelus Files

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  4. Mostly. I think my mother taught me that when I was about nine years old. She caught me playing sandlot football after being told not to. I complained loudly that she was so overprotective that she didn’t even want me to play follow the leader. Her response has stayed with me all these years. She said, “It’s OK for you to play follow the leader, as long as you lead and be damned careful where you go.”

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    1. What’s a leader without a clear sense of judgement and direction? She’s right and a wise woman too. If you got this far, then I believe she did a great job.
      Mothers knows best😀. Thanks, Galtz, I appreciate you taking out time to share this with us.
      Have a good evening.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. “ChronosFeR2” brought me here and I am happy about it because I liked what I found.
    I would like to invite you to have together a cup of tea in “El zoco del escriba” so we can keep talking about whatever you want.
    Un abrazo.
    Alberto Mrteh (El zoco del escriba)

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