Let’s get one thing clear: there is nothing wrong with being a nice, kind, or caring person. So don’t think you have to change your essential nature.
But there are definite drawbacks to being ‘too nice’ all the time, and you should be aware if this is true of you. Think back.
How often do you agree to do things you don’t want to do, just to avoid making someone feel bad? How often do you endure a long, boring conversation just to be polite? How often do you feel that people are taking advantage of you?
You can have the best intentions, but you could be asking for trouble in the long term. You may come to feel overwhelmed or used – and this could build up until you explode one day and damage the relationships you have struggled to preserve.
Here are some warning signs that you may be too nice for your own good – and what you can do about it!
1. You Say SORRY All The Time
Saying “sorry” is perfectly appropriate if there is something you really regret.
But if you catch yourself saying “sorry” every time you sense some disappointment from people, it’s a sign that you are too concerned with others liking you – or that you feel a false sense of guilt.
When someone wants you to do something for them, but you have other plans; or if someone bumps into you, why should you feel guilty? Why should you say “sorry”? Try to avoid saying the word for a whole day.
You’ll be amazed how often you catch yourself about to say it. Pause and ask yourself if there is anything you have to be sorry about.
You could replace sorry at times, with other phrases like, “unfortunately, I have other plans… or “unfortunately I won’t be able to attend, because…”.
State your inability or unwillingness to comply with others’ wishes as facts. You can use words like “unfortunately” to take the sting out of it, but don’t apologize for it.
Written by TJ. For more of his work, visit Iynk.in